Notes on Money and Relationships

Money Is Not What Couples Fight About Most, but It Often Feels That Way A recent article in Parade by Beth Ann Mayer asked three psychologists what couples over 50 fight about most. The answer was not money, which was honestly a surprise to me. It was about boundaries with family members: adult children asking for help, aging parents needing care, and old family roles that no longer fit as children leave home and careers begin to wind down. Money was a close second, but the l

Most couples fall into an approach to sharing finances without ever really deciding, and that can quietly shape the entire relationship. How couples handle money is one of the biggest and least discussed decisions in a relationship. Most couples don’t actually sit down and decide how they’ll manage their finances. Instead, they fall into a system over time based on habits, assumptions, or simply what feels easiest in the moment. And yet, that system can paly a powerful role i